Tuesday, March 4, 2008 Leniency Is For the Powerful If you’re a veteran police officer who beats, chokes, and sexually assaults a prisoner in the State of Idaho, you can anticipate a wrist-slap so trivial as to defy detection by the human nervous system.If, on the other hand, you’re a law-abiding, 66-year-old retired nun, who […]

Wednesday, March 5, 2008 Prepare To Panic! Maxwell Smart and Agent 99 have been taken captive aboard a U-Boat commanded by their KAOS arch-nemesis, Siegfried.A Navy destroyer pursuing the KAOS sub releases depth charges that detonate nearby.“Look, Siegfried,” Agent 99 exclaims, “your men look like they are about to panic.”“Never!” Siegfried defiantly cries. “My men […]

Sunday, March 9, 2008 George W. Bush Hates America Thanks to the Bush Regime, the spirit of the Axis has triumphed: To paraphrase an eminently quotable line from a pretty decent film, We have become what we once beheld. Treating someone with contemptuous condescension is surely one of the most effective ways to express hatred. […]

Monday, March 10, 2008 Of Prostitutes, Prosecutors, and Other Miscreants Eliot Spitzer, paladin of justice and connoisseur of high-priced prostitutes, seen here in happier days: I know there’s a joke here just screaming to be let out, but I’ll leave the details to you, oh reader most gentle and refined.Ernst Theodor Amadeus Hoffmann was a […]

Friday, March 14, 2008 Why Aren’t We Furious? “Temperature — rising; vision — blurring; rage — taking over!”A few nights ago, at the end of a day devoted to productive and pacific pursuits, after you had surrendered to a few hours of well-earned sleep, the people who presume to rule us raided your bank accounts.No, […]

Monday, March 17, 2008 Fool’s Gold In the year of the famine, When starvation and Black Death raged across the land, There were many driven by the Hunger To set sail for the Americas;In search of a new life, and a new hope — Oh, but there were some that couldn’t cope; And they spent […]

Wednesday, March 19, 2008 Iraq, Five Years In: They Really Don’t Care (Updated, March 20) Oh, lucky you! What a privilege you’ve been given by your Emperor, who so earnestly wishes he were young enough to join you on the front lines! (Or not. I’m betting on “not.”)The setting was the National Religious Broadcasters annual […]