It feels like half the world is at war, with the other half deciding which war (and which side) they should join. Billions of people are suffering, and it’s becoming easier to look around and have trouble finding anything to be thankful for. We live in an increasingly hostile and ever changing world where the silver lining seems thin—or even nonexistent. I never imagined we would live in a country that continues to operate off hate and fear.

I was raised with immense patriotism. I love the United States of America. So, how did our country reach a point where half of our citizens cheer on violence, while pointing fingers and singing of the unfair treatment of others?

No one wins when hate prevails. The amount of suffering or how evenly we have suffered is not the point. Our future varies slightly from each perspective, as does how we cope and comprehend a constant, intrusive, and utterly unproductive media. We walk around every day with a tiny window to the entire world in our pockets; it’s a resonating chamber of opinions, custom picked for each individual. But it seems nearly impossible to find even one perrson you can agree with on even a small portion of issues, let alone unite an entire country. Everyone has lived different lives, has experienced the world through eyes which have witnessed both their happiest moments and the ones that keep them up, shaking in the dark. Our perception dictates our reaction.

Focusing on the atrocities across the world, and the hate that causes them, takes a toll on us all. Especially when we have no plan of action. Unproductive conversations do not lead to lasting change. As local communities we have to confront the lies being formulated to keep the majority scared and silent. We cannot lose the hope that can only be found in peace and common ground.

One of the most impactful lessons I have taken away from a conversation with Libertarian Institute Director Scott Horton is, “Everyone is good on something.” Whether it’s common ground with the left on the drug war, or the freedom to protect your family or decide how to raise your children on the right, compromise and listening with respect is the key.

So, what do we do now? We fight back! Not with guns or hate, but with empathy and understanding. We fight back with the ability to say “I don’t agree, but let’s talk about why,” and try to respect each other’s ideas. Unity will be found not through coercion or conformity, but by listening to understand, not listening to win. 

During the escalation of the Vietnam War, even U.S. Secretary of Defense Robert McNamra highlighted as the very first lesson in his book, The Fog of War, “empathize with your enemy.” Empathy has been denigrated as weakness or evidence of some hippie-dippy attitude. But understanding your opponent’s perspective and motivations to make an informed decision leads to true, lasting change and peace.

It is way past time to drown out the hate and to practice peace. Have real conversations to evoke change, make plans and put them to action. Children all over the globe are calling out in pain. They are watching how we behave to better their future. So, ask yourself this: Am I personally leaving a positive mark and good example, or am I pushing an unproductive narrative of fear and continuing the dangerous cycle we have been stuck in for the majority of our recorded history?

Try to hold onto that silver lining. We can find peace and unity through empathy and understanding.